It’s my dad’s birthday today. We’re taking him out tonight, to West Coast for a meal. He’s doing really, really well. His voice is back to normal now, and his walking is really coming on. He can walk a fair distance with just a stick for support. He could walk a long way if it wasn’t for his eyes – if there’s a lot going on around him he gets dizzy. I think it’s just a matter of practice, though – he needs to re-learn to cope with activity around him.
We’re still living with Raine’s family. I’m exhausted and can’t bring myself to look at flats at the moment. There are a few possibilities, but I need a break from house hunting. The thought of having to handle another move is overwhelming...and the idea of dealing with another estate agent/looking at another shit tip makes me want to cry!
We got the surfboard, and it’s mighty fine! Can’t wait to get out on the waves with it. Just need a wetsuit now. The roadtrip was great – the weather was amazing... it was indistinguishable from a beautiful summers day. We were hoping the weather would hold, and we’d get to have a beach BBQ on Sunday. Of course the weather didn’t hold... as soon as we said ‘BBQ’ clouds came racing over, carried by gale force wind. I’ve concluded that the ‘b word’ is how we’ve cursed the last two summers... and, come to think of it, our wedding reception!
We’re off to Newquay in two weeks. Where we will definitely not be having any beach BBQs;-) We’re having two days of surfing lessons, and after that we’ll probably take ourselves into the water, unsupervised. It is impossible to overestimate the extent to which I’m looking forward to Newquay. I love it there; it is, without a doubt, the coolest place in the UK.
At the moment I have an urge to run away – I want to up sticks and set up in someplace new, like we did in Newquay. I’ve not wanted to up sticks and leave for a long while...I always want to go on short trips, but I’ve not wanted to leave indefinitely since we got settled in Lancaster. I think it’s because I’m essentially homeless. My feet are starting to touch the ground, after all the rapid upheaval, and I’m finding there’s no stability. I don’t know where I’m going to be living in a few months, I don’t know if I’ll get funding for a PhD, I don’t know what the long term situation with my dad’s going to be...
I received an offer of a PhD place in Lancaster at the start of the week. Now I just need the funding to go with it! Lancaster is crazy, and even though it’s now up to the individual institutions to allocate funding they don’t tell applicants until July. There’s a job at the University that would be ideal, it’s at the Students’ Union (where I worked for over a year, and won an award: Student Employee of the Year), but it’s full time. I would study alongside the position, obviously, but it would mean a very full on schedule. If I have to get a job it’s ideal, though, and I know if I leave it until July, and I don’t get funding, I’m going to have to settle for something awful.
Wednesday, 25 March 2009
Tuesday, 17 March 2009
Surfing into the Middle Classes

I’ve bought a surfboard. I got it from Ebay, and it’s a bit of a steal. Only catch – I have to pick it up from London. That’s not a big catch, though – it means ROADTRIP! Raine and I are going to go down on Saturday, and we’re going to stop by in Milton Keynes to stock up on American food (they have a very cool US food shop) and have dinner with Paul. We’re hoping to bag another bargain in time for our trip to Newquay, in four weeks. A lot of boards are in the direction of Newquay, so hopefully we can buy something and pick it up on the way down.
To fund the surfboard purchase I have two guitars for sale – a Yamaha Pacifica with a Marshall Amp and a Tanglewood Odyssey. I don’t use either anymore (I just play acoustic, and I have my Martin), so it makes sense to sell. I took them to a local music store, which a sign in the window asking for used instruments...they tried to rip me off. I have five days left on the two items and people are already bidding more than I was offered by the shop.
Things are ok on the home front. I’m with my dad now – we’re waiting for a nurse to visit. He has a bad back, which may or may not be linked to the stroke – we have to ask the Physiotherapist this afternoon. If he didn’t have back pain he’d be great, he’s getting about well, and going up and down the stairs pretty freely. When he got out of hospital the Physiotherapists were really unsure about how he’d handle stairs, but he’s great with them. His eyes are much better, too – he can read normally, except when he’s tired. All in all it’s looking good, but obviously there’s still a long way to go.
I’ve been getting back into my Uni work. Got an essay back last week, and got a really good mark, which was a real relief – it was my first MA essay, so I didn’t know what level I was working at until I got it back. I have some ideas for my Dissertation, and latest essay. It’s great getting back into work – I’ve really missed it. I wrote a proposal for a conference paper and sent it in yesterday, I have next to no chance of being invited! My supervisor suggested it, but it’s with some really big names in Chicago (all expenses paid) – it’s out of my league. Despite being down on myself, and having next to no time on my hands, I put together a proposal – no harm in being rejected, and it’s all good experience. There’s a more reasonable conference I’m going to submit to in a few days, it’s in Cardiff next month.
We still haven’t found a flat...yesterday I looked around a place that was clearly a drugs den! However, we have a glimmer of hope... I took Raine on a magical mystery tour on Sunday. Everyone’s been telling us how great Lytham is these days, so I packed her in the car and took her. I have to say Lytham is pretty nice – especially in this glorious weather (don’t forget – this is the best weather we’ll get all year, so make the most of it!). Lots of book shops, funky restaurants, non-scary pubs (Blackpool’s full of scary pubs)...I have to accept that I’m now middle class, because I want to live in Lytham...
Whilst in Lytham we saw a sign in a shop about an available flat, so we went in and asked about it. We were taken up stairs and shown a *massive* apartment. It was 100% us – had lots of character, it was just perfect – wooden stairs up to the front door, an enormous kitchen, little hide-y holes. Trouble is it cost too much - we’d need a flatmate... which isn’t ideal. However, we’ve decided to look at other places in that direction, and there are lots of options. It seems like Lytham and St Annes are the places the normal people, who want decent flats, live! It’s even cheaper than Blackpool – that makes no sense (for those of you who don’t know the area, Lytham and St Annes are *posh* - really posh)... I think it’s because most of the flats in Blackpool are looking for people on Housing Benefits, and they just set the price at the top end of Housing Benefits.
My legal highs arrived. We’ve tried one lot – ‘Skunk...a new brand of weed’, and it’s pretty good. Got a nice chilling effect, and keeps your head feeling good the day after. The other one’s a bit stronger, so we’re working up to trying that!
Sunday, 8 March 2009
The high life
We took my dad to Leeds last night. He had two short plays being produced by a professional theatre company. Getting him out of the hospital was such a performance. Not the physical removal, but the bureaucracy surrounding it. It took consultations with several doctors, physiotherapists, nurses... He was going to be let out – to go home – on Friday, but that didn’t happen (he should be coming home on Tuesday now). When that plan fell through it seemed like he wouldn’t be able to go to Leeds, but, eventually, they agreed to allow him to leave for the evening, and then come back. The idea of leaving has done him good, his voice has improved a lot over the last few days, and he's been really bright.
The trip wasn't too complicated, we had a wheelchair ready, and he can step in and out of the wheelchair. We had to take so much equipment, to make sure we had everything we'd need – a wheelchair, his walking frame, and a crutch. In the end I don’t think we needed more than the wheelchair. We don’t have a disabled badge at the moment, so we had to drive around Leeds several times, to find the place, and then find an appropriate parking space. I think there’s going to be a steep learning curve when he gets out. There are things you just don’t think about, re. access, when you can walk about freely.
Once we got there the show was really good. There were ten short plays being performed, all of which had been written by aspiring writers, and had faced competition for a place. It was a nice concept - you never got bored, because each play only lasted between 5 and 10 minutes, so you knew there's be a new idea along if one was weak (though most of them were very good). At the end the audience could comment on the plays, and my dad’s got (by far) the most positive feedback (and he was the only writer who'd had two plays accepted). One of my dad's plays had made a woman in the audience cry (it was meant to be sad, so this is a good thing!).
The drive back from Leeds was insane. It was like driving through a minor hurricane, and the rain wasn’t like rain, it was as if buckets of water were being thrown on the windscreen. I was driving across the moors, and it was so scary – the car was just being tossed around, like the wind’s plaything. I think every muscle in my body was tensed. We were in my dad’s car - because it was easier to fit all the stuff he needed in there - so I was the only person who could drive. My dad’s car has power steering, which is nice usually, but in that weather it made me feel less in control – I couldn’t react to the force of the wind as I normally would.
Raine and I have completely moved out of our house in Galgate. We’ve had to move all of our stuff in Raine’s mum’s house, because we just can’t find a flat – everywhere we see is awful. I can’t believe that anyone would live in most of the places we’ve seen. We’re not that picky – seriously. It’s just the places we’re seeing are dire, overpriced, or in seriously dodgy areas. We’ve seen flats that used to be/should be corridors (landlords have just converted all space they’ve got to extort money); one that was across the road from ‘massage’ parlours; and another where you feed £1 coins into a meter to get electricity...
I’m awaiting some legal highs, to try and smoke away my sorrows. They’ll billed as ‘better than weed’, we’ll see. I hope they are - I'm not very good at being a criminal, and I need a giggle! I also want to go on a really good night out, so if anyone’s up for it please let us know! We’ve tried going out the last couple of weekends, but it’s just been a bit of a let-down – no one seems to be out. It’s really quiet on the Blackpool night scene (at least the places we go), in general, at the moment... I think the Banks of Mum and Dad have stopped providing credit for the little uns, and all of us oldies are too exhausted.
The trip wasn't too complicated, we had a wheelchair ready, and he can step in and out of the wheelchair. We had to take so much equipment, to make sure we had everything we'd need – a wheelchair, his walking frame, and a crutch. In the end I don’t think we needed more than the wheelchair. We don’t have a disabled badge at the moment, so we had to drive around Leeds several times, to find the place, and then find an appropriate parking space. I think there’s going to be a steep learning curve when he gets out. There are things you just don’t think about, re. access, when you can walk about freely.
Once we got there the show was really good. There were ten short plays being performed, all of which had been written by aspiring writers, and had faced competition for a place. It was a nice concept - you never got bored, because each play only lasted between 5 and 10 minutes, so you knew there's be a new idea along if one was weak (though most of them were very good). At the end the audience could comment on the plays, and my dad’s got (by far) the most positive feedback (and he was the only writer who'd had two plays accepted). One of my dad's plays had made a woman in the audience cry (it was meant to be sad, so this is a good thing!).
The drive back from Leeds was insane. It was like driving through a minor hurricane, and the rain wasn’t like rain, it was as if buckets of water were being thrown on the windscreen. I was driving across the moors, and it was so scary – the car was just being tossed around, like the wind’s plaything. I think every muscle in my body was tensed. We were in my dad’s car - because it was easier to fit all the stuff he needed in there - so I was the only person who could drive. My dad’s car has power steering, which is nice usually, but in that weather it made me feel less in control – I couldn’t react to the force of the wind as I normally would.
Raine and I have completely moved out of our house in Galgate. We’ve had to move all of our stuff in Raine’s mum’s house, because we just can’t find a flat – everywhere we see is awful. I can’t believe that anyone would live in most of the places we’ve seen. We’re not that picky – seriously. It’s just the places we’re seeing are dire, overpriced, or in seriously dodgy areas. We’ve seen flats that used to be/should be corridors (landlords have just converted all space they’ve got to extort money); one that was across the road from ‘massage’ parlours; and another where you feed £1 coins into a meter to get electricity...
I’m awaiting some legal highs, to try and smoke away my sorrows. They’ll billed as ‘better than weed’, we’ll see. I hope they are - I'm not very good at being a criminal, and I need a giggle! I also want to go on a really good night out, so if anyone’s up for it please let us know! We’ve tried going out the last couple of weekends, but it’s just been a bit of a let-down – no one seems to be out. It’s really quiet on the Blackpool night scene (at least the places we go), in general, at the moment... I think the Banks of Mum and Dad have stopped providing credit for the little uns, and all of us oldies are too exhausted.
Monday, 2 March 2009
Relocation, Relocation, Relocation
Raine and I are moving back to Blackpool (so we can help my parents). Things are crazy at the moment. We need to be out of our house (in Galgate) by Friday, and we don’t have a place to live in Blackpool yet. We moved most of our stuff out of the house, and into Raine’s mum’s house, yesterday. Gordon’s son has a big van, but we could only use it at the weekend, so we had no choice but to move the stuff out yesterday – it would have been impossible without a van. Of course this means we have to move all our stuff again when we find a place!
We had found the perfect flat, but it went before we could sign up for it. Only I had seen it, so we were going to wait for Raine to see it on Saturday... someone signed up before that second viewing, though. It’s taught us a lesson, but a harsh one – it’ll mean if I see somewhere I think is perfect, while Raine’s at work, I need to commit us to it then and there. While Raine and I have very similar tastes, it’s a big responsibility.
We’ve seen so many places this weekend my head’s spinning. Nothing is quite right, though. Anything that would be good is too expensive, and everything else is either too small, or in a dodgy area. We’re not particularly picky, but it’s such a big change for us we want somewhere we can be happy. We have two places to look at tomorrow which I’m very hopeful about. They’re both near my parents, pretty big, and well within our budget. One of them includes gas and electricity with the rent, and the rent is still cheaper than most places we’ve looked at. It’s also really big, and on the ground floor with a disabled shower – which would be great for my dad (my parents only have a toilet downstairs, so if he couldn’t manage stairs for a while he could come round to our place for a shower!). It sounds perfect, but you can’t help but think with all these boxes ticked there must be something wrong with it! Hopefully I’ll be proven wrong.
My dad’s doing well – I visit him every day, and I’m constantly impressed by how happy he’s keeping. He’s still in the hospital...in fact he’s still in the same bed... but they seem to have stabilised his blood sugar and blood pressure. He’s still not allowed to walk without supervision, but he’s progressing, and his spirits are high. I get a little annoyed, because the hospital seem so short staffed; he hardly gets any physiotherapy time each day (and none at all over the weekend). He’s meant to be seeing someone about his eyes, but that hasn’t happened yet. I guess it’s because of NHS funding... it really gets me down. We know so many people who are using the State – they can’t be bothered to get a job (and they’ve told us as much), and just claim benefits... I just think, if only the NHS could have the money they’re wasting (and the taxes they aren’t contributing). It gets me so angry...it’s enough to turn me right wing;-)
In-between hospital visiting, flat hunting and moving out we really haven’t been doing anything else. Obviously our Belfast trip was cancelled. We went out on Friday night, with friends, but we were so exhausted we were home before midnight. I’ll be so happy when we’re settled somewhere and we can get into a better routine – we’re eating pretty awfully (living off ready meals and takeaways), and I’m so used to cooking it’s really getting to me. I am going to try and cook a meal tonight, ready for Raine when she gets back from work...but it depends on me getting insured on my dad’s car (so I can go to the supermarket), which is turning into a nightmare – the insurance company insist on speaking to my dad...I finally said they could (although he can speak his voice is very croaky), because it really needs sorting, and asked them to call back in two minutes as his hospital number was on the phone I was speaking on. They didn’t call back. Now I’m waiting for them to call back, again...
Of course, amongst all this, I’m trying to keep up with Uni. Thankfully this is my quietest term, but that doesn’t make it all that quiet! I’m trying to keep on top of PhD applications, but to be honest I’ve let a few deadlines go, and if it comes down to it I’ll take a year out and apply for 2010 entry. I prioritise my current study in the time that I have to work. On Friday I found out about a PhD studentship – their person specification practically described my research plan and experience... but it’s in London, and I’d have to live in the South West. As things stand that just wouldn’t be possible. I think I’ll apply, though, and if I did get offered a place, and the funding (unlikely!), then I would re-assess my options at that point.
We had found the perfect flat, but it went before we could sign up for it. Only I had seen it, so we were going to wait for Raine to see it on Saturday... someone signed up before that second viewing, though. It’s taught us a lesson, but a harsh one – it’ll mean if I see somewhere I think is perfect, while Raine’s at work, I need to commit us to it then and there. While Raine and I have very similar tastes, it’s a big responsibility.
We’ve seen so many places this weekend my head’s spinning. Nothing is quite right, though. Anything that would be good is too expensive, and everything else is either too small, or in a dodgy area. We’re not particularly picky, but it’s such a big change for us we want somewhere we can be happy. We have two places to look at tomorrow which I’m very hopeful about. They’re both near my parents, pretty big, and well within our budget. One of them includes gas and electricity with the rent, and the rent is still cheaper than most places we’ve looked at. It’s also really big, and on the ground floor with a disabled shower – which would be great for my dad (my parents only have a toilet downstairs, so if he couldn’t manage stairs for a while he could come round to our place for a shower!). It sounds perfect, but you can’t help but think with all these boxes ticked there must be something wrong with it! Hopefully I’ll be proven wrong.
My dad’s doing well – I visit him every day, and I’m constantly impressed by how happy he’s keeping. He’s still in the hospital...in fact he’s still in the same bed... but they seem to have stabilised his blood sugar and blood pressure. He’s still not allowed to walk without supervision, but he’s progressing, and his spirits are high. I get a little annoyed, because the hospital seem so short staffed; he hardly gets any physiotherapy time each day (and none at all over the weekend). He’s meant to be seeing someone about his eyes, but that hasn’t happened yet. I guess it’s because of NHS funding... it really gets me down. We know so many people who are using the State – they can’t be bothered to get a job (and they’ve told us as much), and just claim benefits... I just think, if only the NHS could have the money they’re wasting (and the taxes they aren’t contributing). It gets me so angry...it’s enough to turn me right wing;-)
In-between hospital visiting, flat hunting and moving out we really haven’t been doing anything else. Obviously our Belfast trip was cancelled. We went out on Friday night, with friends, but we were so exhausted we were home before midnight. I’ll be so happy when we’re settled somewhere and we can get into a better routine – we’re eating pretty awfully (living off ready meals and takeaways), and I’m so used to cooking it’s really getting to me. I am going to try and cook a meal tonight, ready for Raine when she gets back from work...but it depends on me getting insured on my dad’s car (so I can go to the supermarket), which is turning into a nightmare – the insurance company insist on speaking to my dad...I finally said they could (although he can speak his voice is very croaky), because it really needs sorting, and asked them to call back in two minutes as his hospital number was on the phone I was speaking on. They didn’t call back. Now I’m waiting for them to call back, again...
Of course, amongst all this, I’m trying to keep up with Uni. Thankfully this is my quietest term, but that doesn’t make it all that quiet! I’m trying to keep on top of PhD applications, but to be honest I’ve let a few deadlines go, and if it comes down to it I’ll take a year out and apply for 2010 entry. I prioritise my current study in the time that I have to work. On Friday I found out about a PhD studentship – their person specification practically described my research plan and experience... but it’s in London, and I’d have to live in the South West. As things stand that just wouldn’t be possible. I think I’ll apply, though, and if I did get offered a place, and the funding (unlikely!), then I would re-assess my options at that point.
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